The Apprentice: How Siniora is about to Steal a Central Bank Without Really Trying

 LONDON –

Lebanon’s financial elites—who have all the fiscal prudence of a drunken sailor on shore leave—are at it again. And leading the charge? None other than Fuad Siniora, the financial wizard who helped conjure Lebanon’s towering debt pile, a Ponzi scheme so audacious that even Bernie Madoff would have taken notes.

Siniora, ever the maestro of financial chicanery, has dusted off his old playbook. His latest gambit? Engineering, through smoke, mirrors, and the usual sleight of hand, the selection of Lebanon’s next Central Bank governor. And who’s been taken along for the ride? Alas, PM Nawwaf Salam, who’s blindsided by Siniora and his merry band of schemers, including a newly appointed “economic sinister”, for the covert mission of handpicking the perfect horse for this fools’ race, Jihad Azour.

Now, this isn’t just about planting a friendly face in the governor’s chair. No, no. This is a two-for-one political heist. First, Siniora and his former Deep Financial State cronies are once again muscling the President of the Republic out of the process, claiming—without a hint of irony—that Lebanon’s Maronite presidents are financial simpletons -often army generals- unfit to weigh in on the country’s money matters. (Because, you know, Fuad has done such a bang-up job himself.) They’ve done it with every President since the Taif Accord. Second, with the banking sector teetering on the edge of a fiery abyss, the man at the helm of the Central Bank will be one of the deciders on the sector’s future. And if you think Fuad & Friends plan to throw that rope to the Lebanese people instead of their own banking pals -whether existing or future bank owners-you’d be hallucinating.

For decades, Lebanon’s financial policies have been a tragicomic mess, mostly written in Siniora-ese, a language in which words like “stability” and “growth” actually mean “kicking the can down the road while stuffing your friends’ pockets.” When he was Finance Minister, Siniora pioneered the art of selling Lebanese government bonds at interest rates so usurious that even 19th-century loan sharks would blush. And let’s not forget that he worked hand-in-hand with the now-disgraced Riad Salameh, who ran the Central Bank like a failing casino that just kept doubling down.

Fast forward to today, and here we go again. Only this time, Siniora isn’t just scheming in the shadows—he’s aiming straight for the control room. The governor’s seat, traditionally held by a Maronite, is a big deal. It’s the last major financial position not yet overrun by Siniora’s establishment, given that the Finance Ministry is already in Shia hands and the Banking Control Commission is another Sunni fiefdom. So, naturally, Siniora wants to make sure that the last thin thread of financial oversight left in this country is firmly within his grip, and away from the president’s. Talk about a nice start for a “National Salvation and Reform” government.

And let’s talk about the supposed frontrunner for the job, selected by Siniora and nurtured in his Ministry of Finance for decades, before temporarily parking him at the IMF, in a nice cushy job. If his past track record is any indication, his approach to Lebanon’s economic crisis will be just as innovative as applying leeches to treat a gunshot wound. Under Siniora and his apprentice’s “guidance,” the Lebanese state’s debt ballooned like a Thanksgiving parade float, and the Central Bank devolved into an elaborate scheme to sustain the illusion of a functioning economy while public money vanished faster than a politician’s campaign promises. So, naturally, Azour seems like the perfect guy to carry on the tradition of fiscal arson.